"He'll sit there and go, Dipsy... Po... Dipsy... Po. I honestly don't think he knows colors. Just Teletubbies."

10.04.2005

My dog has worms.

First, I should talk about lovely times at Alex's house.

Me: He's a little socially awkward.
[Alex cracks up.]
Me: Do I even want to know why that is funny to you?

Alex: Robin looks like if you averaged the difference between Dakota Fanning and Kate Hudson.
Me: Split the difference?
Alex: Oh whatever.

Anyway. Alex loves bingo with a passion. Don't ever ask her to play it, and if she asks you to play it, just say no. Nancy Reagan would tell you the same thing: Just say no. Also, I am officially amazing at darts. Uncle B-Money would definitely be proud of me.

Ohhh, service day. How joyous can you get. Three hours of putting together literacy kits with Alex and Pencil Case. Which involved a great many hilarious things, such as:

  • making dirty words with magnetic letters.

  • Pencil Case getting a blister from his scissors.

  • watching the movie version of Owen approximately nine thousand times. (Okay, twice.)

  • being the bad slow group.


  • So, finally, we were so bad and slow that Mrs. Pease decided she got to be on our team. Um, what? You just knew Pencil Case was going to have way too much fun with that, didn't you.

    Pencil Case: We should dress up as Dorothy and Toto for Halloween, Mrs. Pease.
    Me: I thought you were being Brooker's twin.
    Pencil Case: Oh yeah. That's right!
    Alex: Are you going to drive to school on a motorcycle?
    Pencil Case: Brooker drives a motorcycle?
    Alex and I: Um, yes.
    Pencil Case: Oh my god! Mrs. Pease! Did you know that Brooker drives a motorcycle?
    Mrs. Pease: Yes.
    Pencil Case: Have you ever ridden on it?
    Mrs. Pease: No, and I can't say that I would.

    Mrs. Pease: Oh God-- I mean, oh gosh. I keep messing up. This is too complicated for me.

    Mrs. Pease, out of absolutely nowhere: My dog has worms.

    Next Table, a thousand times: Can we have a magnetic "I"?
    Pencil Case, before they can even finish asking: NO!!!

    Anyway. Then we went off to Mickey D's. I ran down Webster and I was very far ahead of Pencil Case and Alex. Then, as always happens when I walk down Webster, a creepy guy honked at me. And he had the craziest car horn we've ever heard. It was this little ditty of a car horn. It was really funny.

    Whilst we were at everyone's favorite dining establishment, it began to rain. Pencil Case wouldn't leave until the rain stopped. Then we had to wait for him to buy a Fruit and Yogurt Parfait. By the time he finally mixed up the whole stupid thing, he declared it curdled and no longer wanted to eat it.

    Then we ventured off to Alex's. We decided to play a game. We began to play Trivial Pursuit, but Pencil Case got mad at it for being "so ghetto", so we played Taboo. Except, to make Alex angry, we would always pretend we didn't know the answers to hers.

    Alex, trying to explain tricycle: Little kids have these.
    Me: Big wheels?
    Alex: No, but close!
    Me: Bikes with training wheels?
    Alex: Not a unicycle but a...
    Pencil Case: Bicycle?
    Alex: No, not that, but a...
    Me: Quadricycle?

    Alex, explaining "disease": It's what the D in STD is.
    Pencil Case: Um... I don't know what that means.
    Alex: Kellie!
    Me: Ohhh! Doofus!! Sexually Transmitted Doofus!!
    Alex: YOU GUYS SUCK!

    Eventually, she was very PO'ed but then it was time for her to go to her doctor appointment and Pencil Case and I to come to my house. We played Mario Kart, which Pencil Case is absolutely dreadful at. He got better, though. First we talked on the phone with Chels to see how her day was, and she told us crazy stories of pulling weeds with Adult Hermione and annoying freshman boys in the rain. While we were on the phone, we thought we heard a bunch of men breaking into the house but it was actually my dad. We were truly freaked out. Then we went on the computer and made Pencil Case a bunch of crazy LiveJournal icons. But then he had to leave for play practice and now my bored self is just sitting online, writing in this thing, talking to Chelsea, and downloading the new Franz Ferdinand CD off iTunes!

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