"He'll sit there and go, Dipsy... Po... Dipsy... Po. I honestly don't think he knows colors. Just Teletubbies."

10.24.2005

Best. Weekend. Ever.

This weekend was absolutely, positively amazing. First, on Friday night, Pencil Case, Chelsea, Alex, Elly, Tiffany, Phil, Mike, Sam, Greg, and I went to the Morgue. It was so fun. First, there was the car ride with the East-siders, Alex, Elly, Tiffany, and me.

Alex, looking at a coat lying on the ground: OH MY GOD! Is that a dead person!

Alex: I was worried that it would get cold. So I put three pairs of socks on... and now I can't feel my toes.

Alex, sarcastically: Yeah, Kellie and her mom don't get along at all.
Mom: Definitely. We never get along. Ever.
Tiffany: Yeah. She always comes to school and she's like, "Oh my god! My mom is such a meanie! She doesn't let me eat cookies!"

Tiffany: I would definitely join the circus if an opportunity arose.

Tiffany: I frickin' hate kids. First of all, they're ugly. Second of all, all they do is whine and cry and scream and drool all over themselves and make a mess out of everything.

Anyway. After that lovely car ride, we all met up under the giant light and went in line. Where we met a crazy drunk girl named Cassie. I don't even know what ot say about her. She was crazy. And drunk. And I feel that is enough elaboration. She took our picture and then we all went through the woods.

After the woods, there is a giant field with a bonfire, concessions stand, and a giant movie screen, where you wait until your number is called to go through the house. We waited for about an hour and a half and that was pretty interesting.

Drunk Cassie, to a random person at the concessions stand: I remember you from camp! Vegetable camp!!

Along with Drunk Cassie, we also met someone dressed up as a zombie and an escaped-convict gorilla... don't even ask. The whole time, Pencil Case and Alex were freaking out. Then our number, 191, was called and we got to go into the house. Which was pretty exciting. The best part is the giant slide at the end. It really isn't very scary, though. By the time we got out, it was about midnight and we went home.

Saturday, I slept very late. Then, Mom and I went on our crazy balloon romp, which I don't think I even want to explain. It is ridiculous and obscene. And I hate it when balloons pop at random.

Then it was time to go to Chelsea's to get ready for the dance. Chelsea was Millie from Thoroughly Modern Millie, Abigail was a bunch of grapes, Pencil Case was Mr. Brooker, and I was Mrs. Campbell. We all looked pretty amazing. And, as usual, crazy conversations took place.

Mary: Chels!! Where are the pipe cleaners?!
Chelsea, talking to Abigail as she pins balloons on: Well, now we gotta pin some on your abdomen.

We also could only pin balloons to Abigail's front so that she could ride in the car to the dance, so when we arrived at the dance, very early, we had to finish pinning things to her back. Abigail is the best damn bunch of grapes I have ever in my life seen, let me tell you.

Anyway. The dance. It was probably the greatest dance of my entire life. First of all, Mr. Brooker and Mrs. Campbell were there. And they thought our costumes were hilarious. (Although I think Mrs. Brown was probably the most entertained.) This resulted in a great many random comments from the two of them.

Brooker, to Pencil Case: Do you want to hold the brethalyzer?
Pencil Case: Sure!! Actually, can I take a breathalyzer test?
Brooker: Sure. [Pencil Case takes the test and, of course, is not drunk.] Look at that... Mr. Brooker is sober.

Brooker: Nice tie.
[I would just like to mention that he is wearing an identical tie today.]

Mrs. Campbell: Oh my god! You are me! I mean, Mrs. Brown told me... but, wow! That is amazing. [Later, after we notice that we both only have one dimple:] Awww. You even have the dimple!

Anyway. Pencil Case and I definitely won the costume contest. Woohoo! What did we win, you may be wondering? Well, ten dollars each. And bragging rights. Which is more than enough for us, really.

And Abigail won the pizza/subs for our lunch table!! Woohoo!

After Zoo Boo, Madame, Frau, and a bunch of German kids arrived. So we talked to Madame for a bit.

Pencil Case: Was Zoo Boo fun?
Madame: Well. Let's see. We handed out candy to children. In the rain. In costume. For four hours. At the zoo.
Me: I like that "at the zoo" is the worst part.

She also brought us the facial expression of the night while watching the video for My Chemical Romance's "Helena." Best face ever.

The three best comments of the night would have to be these, though:

Vicky, who is dressed up like Jan from Grease, all night long: Brush-a-brush-a-brush-a!

Alex, as her green Elphaba makeup begins to come off: I'm meeeeeeeelting! I'm meeeeeelting!

Mrs. Brown, walking into the Commons and giggling hysterically: Keishia's undressing!!!!

Yes. Life is amazing. Have a good Monday, everybody. ♥

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