"He'll sit there and go, Dipsy... Po... Dipsy... Po. I honestly don't think he knows colors. Just Teletubbies."

4.13.2005

Changing My Name

"There's a civil war inside me because I'm a slave of my heart and my mind wants to free it."
-Maggie, on Friday, at Atlanta Bread Company

Right now, I am in French pretending to be productive. This means talking to Maggie about babies, Paul's He-MS (male PMS), and other various insane things, like the fact that Britney Spears is officially pregnant. That is going to be one gross baby. And Madame is convinced that the juniors are going to beat up DD.

Madame, as DD walks toward the juniors: DD... why are you doing that? They are going to beat you up! Do you really want to get beat up? (DD ignores her. Madame notices that DD and the juniors all have curly hair.) Awww... look! They all have curly hair.

Also, we decided I am going to change my name because everyone spells it wrong anyway.

Me: Hey, Madame, what should I change my name to?
Madame: You should change it to the Russian name Tatiana.
Maggie: Oooh. That suits you. We should look up what it means.
Me: [Looks up what it means.] "Fairy queen."
Maggie and Me: [Maniacal laughter for about ten minutes.]

So, you heard it here first. Thanks to: a) being tired of people misspelling my name, and b) crazy people, I am now Tatiana the Fairy Queen. Before this, Maggie declared my new name to be Anya. This is because I am going to grow up to be an evil Russian dictator with a fast walk who eats too many bagels and hires her friends to be assistants in charge of making fun of sluts or checking out cute males. At least until the UN shuts me down. Actually, I would really be a bad dictator, I just have a very imposing presence. I would annex people and then say, "Yeah, do whatever the hell you want."

Before all this nonsense, we had a French Club meeting. This means that the first thing I heard when I got to my locker this morning was Madame shouting, "WHAT ARE YOU KIDS DOING WITH THE DOUGHNUTS!?!?"

Later, in Study Hall: English, I had to give my speech and almost threw up. Apparently, however, I did not look nervous, which is baffling. Wolfae did an amazing job though!

ICP involved more Life Lessons from Adult Hermione. She has been especially insane lately, as demonstrated by little talks like this:
"The reason that the upper half of the auditorium doesn't have carpeting is not because that's where the freshmen sit."


And:

"A few years ago, if you had a cell phone as a teenager, everyone thought you were a drug dealer! Seriously... kids would get expelled if they had cell phones... but that's because the ones who had cell phones were the ones who were dealing drugs."


Sadly, my day was pretty boring otherwise.

1 Comments:

Blogger Pencil Case babbled mindlessly...

Fine. Here is your comment, Grammar Ho.

I cannot believe that you didn't include the daily art class in this entry. Very sad, indeed.

Tatiana wouldn't fit you at all. You are more of a Mildrina. Yesssssssssss...Mildrina.

Well, I hope you have a wonder night, seeing as how I am posting this at 10:16pm.

-Pencil Case.

10:16 PM

 

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