"He'll sit there and go, Dipsy... Po... Dipsy... Po. I honestly don't think he knows colors. Just Teletubbies."

12.28.2004

Smile Like You Mean It

Today was an extremely entertaining and hilarious day. For those of you who are wondering what entertaining consists of, here is a minute-or-less-recap: escapes to Max and Erma's, chicken fingers shaped like Madagascar, big-ass pickup trucks, me being made fun of for being short, seeing G-Dawg at B&N, filling G-Dawg in on all the hawt NDA gossip, darts and pool, coming out of the closet in many nationalities, personality disorders, small personality flaws like murder, and flying.

This is a sign that my story is much better encompassed with quotes, so here goes.

Actually, first I will start with a quote from my brother, Fake Sick, when he picked up the phone yesterday when Pencil Case called. "What? Oh, okay. (Looks at the Caller ID screen as he hands me the phone.) Leslie somebody is calling for you." Anyway, back to the entertainingness of today.

Maggie: IN! AN! IGLOO!

Maggie: Ooh! My chicken finger is shaped like a saxophone!
Me: Wow! Mine is shaped like a musical note!
Chels: Mine is a one-legged dog!
Me: This one is shaped like Madagascar! (Points to the remaining chicken nugget on Chellie's plate.) And that one is shaped like a squished toad!

Maggie, pointing to her five-year-old cousin's shoes: Kellie, here are your shoes!

Maggie: I bet she can hardly see over the steering wheel!
Me: Yeah. So, are we done making fun of short people?

Chels, telling a story about Erik: And then he said, "You have nice knuckles. I have fat knuckles. I have fuckles."

Me: So, I'm paranoid and Maggie's obsessive-compulsive. What do you want to be, Chels? You could be schizoid or a kleptomaniac or multiple-personality.
Emily: Or all of the above!
Chelsea: I think I want to have multiple-personality disorder. That would actually be sort of fun. You could be a hyena one minute, and Bill Gates the next!

Maggie: Paul lives on Majestic Oak Road. (Chelsea and I collapse in laughter.)

Chels: We should drive to Russia!
Me: That doesn't even make sense.
Maggie: That's impossible.
Chels: Well, we'll just have to patch together the Bering Strait, then, won't we?!

Maggie, in front of eight dozen old people: I nap all the time! I feel like an old person!
G-Dawg: Maggie, shhhhh.

Anyway, add on top of all that hilarity: our insane innuendoes playing pool (come on, it's a game with sticks and balls, so much is possible); talking about people whom we hate; and coming out of the closet in Swedish, English, Rosieonics, jazz-hands, and Emily's dance costume. Oh, and me being paranoid ("Only the paranoid survive." --Emily); and the incident of Maggie's cousin scaring the bejesus outta us by doing absolutely nothing. Well, she did do something, she said "Hi!" in her cute little kid voice, and none of us had noticed her there before. Hence us screaming and Maggie falling over, with me doing a vague stop-drop-and-roll.

And, no matter what Maggie and Chels say, I did NOT do the Sign of the Cross after paying the waitress at Max and Erma's. Well, if I did, I forgot it about seven seconds later.

4 Comments:

Blogger Magster babbled mindlessly...

HAHA! I was liek peeing reading that!! We are crazy!! But I love us anyway!

9:20 PM

 
Blogger Kellinka babbled mindlessly...

I love us too.

9:27 PM

 
Blogger Felicity Finn babbled mindlessly...

FUCKLES!!!

11:14 AM

 
Blogger Kellinka babbled mindlessly...

I think that is the single greatest comment ever left on this blog.

10:37 PM

 

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